What if...

I like watching Sportscenter almost daily, just ask my wife. I have seen the difference between soccer highlights and basketball highlights. So, I would like to make a list of "what if basketball highlights were the same as soccer highlights?"

• After every made basket, basketball players would take off their shirts and run around for 5 minutes until the announcer stopped yelling "baaaaaaaaaaaasket"
• The highlights would show a bunch of shots that almost went in
• Every time there was a foul (which would most likely be a flop), two little men would come out and take the player away in a stretcher. The player on the stretcher would then come back into the game about 5 minutes later.
  
• The announcers would be excited about a tie

Okay, the second "what if..." goes like this. I was having a conversation with someone awhile back. They were saying that eating too much ice cream or sweets was just as bad for you as drinking too much beer. Needless to say, we argued about it for a little bit, but then I thought to myself, "what if eating Ice Cream and sweets were like drinking beer?"

• Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD) would have to be changed to Mothers Against Sweet Substances (MASS)
• Instead of a sobriety test, policemen would have to perform "sugar variety" tests.
• Linger longers would just be out of control
• The breathalizer would stay pretty much the same, except the better your breath was the more trouble you would be in.
  
• Too much ice cream would lead to a hangover of the love handles the morning after
• After winning the World Series the players would simply throw cinnamon rolls at one another

Please feel free to comment about any other "what ifs..." that you've thought about.